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08-Nov-2017 01:47

How would men on Tinder treat someone who told them upfront she had a boyfriend?

How would they treat a girl who asked to be left alone?

Since you have to “Like” people, or swipe right, to get any chance of interaction, Doug and I both swiped right on 100 people (no rejections, or left swipes) to start things off. Oh man, that first night we were on Tinder, I was over at Doug’s place and my phone was just going off.

Before I had even finished my swipes, I’d already matched with a guy who immediately called me a cunt and then blocked me, another dude who so eloquently complimented me with “Nice research beeyotch,” and about five other men who just sent a “Hey,” meaning they really didn’t look at anything on my profile besides the pouty-lipped, blonde photo of me. Out of the 100 guys I swiped right on, I immediately matched with almost a quarter. Guys were messaging me (“hey” more than anything) telling me I was beautiful, asking about my research, more.

I’m a firm believer that probably 90% of the time, girls do not owe guys shit. There were guys, though, that took my being on Tinder yet not available to them very personally. I feel like I didn’t do enough damage to you to cause you to say that. He had one girl say she read his profile and was curious what my research was about – totally acknowledging I existed!

It totally makes sense – more options, even if they’re not all 100% what you want, equal more hookup opportunities for guys, while for girls, fewer matches mean fewer creeps texting you at 2 a.m. It’s not a super significant number – and really, I had almost three times as many matches, which is totally what should have happened according to those Times statistics – but it gets bad when you look at the messages. I don’t want to start our look through the messages on a totally negative note.

In order to get more results, and maybe a message for Doug, we kept our profiles going for a month, each day swiping right on another 20 people. Seriously, #notallmen (rolling my eyes, you can too) on Tinder were terrible to me. Oh, and of course, there are men that don’t read your profile and just want pictures of your tits. From the very first message, guys I am hoping did not read my profile invited me over to chill out, watch a movie and let them completely dominate me.

Since I’ve been in a serious relationship with my boyfriend Doug for nearly two years now, Tinder has never been necessary to me.

Still, I’ve always found it curious how the app has the tagline “It’s How People Meet,” so different from other dating apps, which put the focus on love and connection and building relationships.

In contrast, Tinder seems so casual, and the way Tinder tries endlessly to market itself as wholesome and friendly makes it appear as though you could go on there to find friends just as much as you could to find hookups. I didn’t believe the Tinder dating pool would respect a girl who went on the site for any reason other than to meet people to date/hookup with.